Do you ever question reality? I get these weird dejavus sometimes and it’s strange because I feel like what’s going on at that same very moment has happened before. My sister and I were talking about always checking if the door is locked since you never know. You could think you locked it but it could still be open. She then told me a little short story of hers where one day when she locked her door thinking it was locked when actually it wasn’t.
She later found that out when a friend of hers came inside without her having to unlock the door for him. She was confused so she went to go check the door. She locked it then tried opening to see if it will, and it did. Since then, it became a habit of hers to always double check if the door is locked or not by twisting the door knob to see if it’ll open. At the end of her story, she told me a very powerful quote of her own that made me question some things that happened to me in the past.
“What you think is real may not be real, reality is never absolute.” ~ S.C.K.
Just take a moment and ponder on those words deeply before jumping to conclusions… That quote reminded me of a deception that happened about 2 months ago with my other older sister and me.
On our first day of basketball practice, our coach brought two of his balls for us to keep temporally during the time period that he’ll be coaching us. We practiced for about one hour and thirty minutes before leaving. The coach dropped us in front of his school with our car where he works at and picked us up from. When we were leaving, we checked to make sure all the doors were locked and that the basketballs were inside.
We left the car in the school driveway because our sister who also works in the same school as the coach will need it later to come back home, so we took a taxi. Fast forward to later that evening, my sister arrives home from work. I wanted to go take the basketballs to bring it inside but she said not to, I could get it in the morning since I don’t need them now. I agreed with her and decided to take them in the morning.
The next morning, I forgot to take them before she left for work, so I couldn’t go practice as planned. I made sure to remind myself to pick up the balls when she comes back that evening. Later, I go down to retrieve the basketballs when she comes home from work. I saw that there was only one whereas, my sister and I saw two. I ask my sisters’ driver about the other ball and he said there was only one in the backseat when he replaced it in the trunk. I was confused and my sister was too, we go upstairs and she asks my other sister if there was two balls, she replied “Yes.”
We both agreed adamantly that there were two balls and that someone probably stole the other one… This is where the unconscious lie begins to unfold. We told her that maybe one of the guards at the school took the ball because we left the keys with one of the trustworthy guards to keep for my sister; Or that maybe it was the driver, everyone seemed like a suspect. My sister became suspicious too because we planted the seeds of doubt within her. She began suspecting all the guards that were present when we parked the car, and especially the guard whom we gave the key to, and also the driver himself.
Everyone became a key suspect in our eyes, but the question was why in the world would they want to steal a single ball? At that time, we came up with reasons that seemed plausible but thinking back now, we were really foolish. It’s so easy to point fingers at others and not think things through.
Weeks fly by and still no sign of the missing ball, we lose hope of ever finding it. It was also embarrassing for us because that wasn’t our ball and it was supposedly stolen from our car. All thoughts about the missing ball vanished through time and we no longer talked about it since it was an unsolved issue. However, just two months ago, the coach tells me at practice that the ball has been found…
He recounts to me that his friend and his friends’ girlfriend that were playing basketball on the other side of the court on the same day as us were videotaping each other when the other one is playing. When they were watching the videos they took, they saw the coach and me in the background leaving the basketball on the bench that we were sitting on when we were leaving. His friend was surprised and remembered our coach talking about one time to him about the missing ball. He sent the video to the coach and called him about the ball. The coach was very surprised and also confused just like my sister and me because he thought as well that we had left two basketballs in the backseat, not one.
After he finished telling me about the balls’ whereabouts, a feeling of great shame and embarrassment rose in my chest. All those past weeks, I was thinking the whole time that someone stole the ball and was pointing fingers at guiltless people who did not deserve my mistrust. I also felt a bit scared because I had to tell my big sister the truth in what really happened, and I knew she would be very mad at me because she is an honest person and doesn’t like lies in any shape or form. She would also feel guilty too because she believed us with no hesitation and began suspecting others who were innocent.
This lie that my other sister and I created was not intended at all but yet, it just took form because of a so called missing ball that we thought we saw. I then began to think about similar events that happened with me thinking I saw or heard something, but was proven otherwise. What we did was truly shameful and I regret it, we shouldn’t have spoken too fast and jumped to conclusions. Those people don’t know the comments I made about them maybe stealing our ball, and I’m too ashamed to tell them either. Though, I sincerely regret my actions and I’d like to think that I learned something from it.
Which leads me to another original quote, but by my dear mother this time.
“You were given two ears, two eyes, and only one mouth for a reason.” ~ R.D.L.K.
I tend to use my mouth more than my sight and hearing, which is very unfortunate because that bad habit of mine has led me to many sticky situations. Controlling my mouth is one of the many things that seem to be hard to control although, it’s just mental in the end.
Many things that we think we may have heard or saw could be entirely or partly false, and turn into a lie that we did not intend to forge. We need to analyze people, events, and things first before we open our mouths to speak. It is extremely important, and if this skill is learned then it’ll prevent a lot of unwanted situations. Think first before you act and try your best to give the benefit of doubt to others, especially to those who’ve done no wrong to you.